Category Archives: Family

You’re going WHERE?

Let me begin by telling everyone this: I’m proud of my upbringing and the heritage I’ve been raised in.  I was raised on a Pentecostal church pew.  I don’t want anyone to think I have resentments or regrets for the good experiences I’ve had in my walk with the Lord. This is not a knock or attack on Pentecostal Church. If you read it that way, this is not my intention.

Throughout my life, I looked at people who left Pentecostal churches to attend a different “flavor” – a Baptist church for example – as someone who was going weak and didn’t want the “full-gospel.”  Many Pentecostals I know do the same. I’ve heard the talk, gossip, and speculations.  However that didn’t stop those who left from leaving without ever looking back.  Whether I’ll look back or not is yet to be said, but for now. We’re happy, plugged in, and growing again.

The last few years has been an entertaining ride, should I say, for us.  It began about 6 months before I stepped down from an eldership position at a church that we moved here to work with.  I began to disagree with so much of what was being said not just from the pulpit, but from my mind as a result of the dogmas I had adopted over most of my life.  There were issues in my personal life and marriage that were not above the grace of God, but it was my responsibility to the health of that congregation for me to step down. So we stepped down and left abruptly so we wouldn’t talk ourselves out of it.  It wasn’t a popular decision, but it was the right one for us.

We visited churches all over the area to just attend, regroup, and grow.  Every one of them we visited (except one) was of a Pentecostal influence, because that was what we were used to.  We looked for the energetic (mildly put) music, fiery preaching, and emotional experience we were used to.  There was plenty of it, but all of them ended up to have a common thread that we needed to steer away from.

For a year and a half, we drifted around, and even helped another couple plant their ministry.  Because we didn’t feel we fit in at the churches we visited, we even “helped” them by starting a Sunday morning service.  As time went by, we realized that this kind of “help” wasn’t the answer we or they needed.

So we realized, maybe we were avoiding the very kind of place we needed at this time of our lives.  We visited one church, one of the largest in the region that is negatively referred to a “seeker-friendly.” Just about everything I heard about them was false. The first Sunday we visited, they preached on idolatry, and in a very convicting way.  We really enjoyed it, but it was too far from the area we live to really plug in.

Then we re-visited another church that we had not given much of a chance before.  

Our kids went to camp with their friends that attend this church, and they did so much to make them/us feel welcome as part of the group – but not in a “we have to have you here, we sure can use people like you” kind of way.  We decided after we returned from our vacation the following week we would come back and really see what it’s all about. Why did not give them a chance before? Because it was a Southern Baptist church. Period.  It was all based on preconceived notions that it was lukewarm, dead, and condoned the mentality of “sign the card and you’re saved no matter what.”   However, I found that those notions, too, were lies.

We are just as imperfect, and as jacked up as we ever were. However, we are no longer having to put on a mask to look good for everyone.  We no longer have to smile when we are hurting.  I no longer have to pursue doing “platform” type ministry, when my heart is not in it.   All my talents and abilities are available to the Lord’s work, but it feels good to know there are capable people doing everything I know how to do, so there is no excuse or opportunity for me hiding behind a keyboard, soundboard, camera, or even pulpit while God deals with me.

I have to say, we have thoroughly enjoyed finding a church “home” once again in Little Flock Baptist Church.  So often when looking for something we need we avoid what we need because we’ve been told something about it that is untrue.  Maybe you are like us.  Looking for somewhere to worship, where your family will grow, but you won’t go to “that” church because of what you were told.  Let me tell you, forget what other people think about you and do what you need to do for yourself and for your family.

For those who are reading this, wondering “why don’t they come to OUR church?” It’s not because we don’t like you, or your church.  It’s because this is where we felt the Lord wanted our family, and we know now this was finally, Him.

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What’s next?…

Many have been asking, there has been some speculation, and we have not been clear ourselves at times as to what is next for us. Now we are clear, so Melissa and I are proud to be announcing it right here on my blog…

Back in the summer, we started the process of praying over what was next for us… I spoke to friends, mentors, church planters, family members, and we prayed much about it.  We felt like God was going to do something great in Mt Washington, KY and we were going to be a part of it. Of course the first thing that came to mind was to start a ministry. We wanted to do something out of the box, and different than what everyone else is doing, reaching people that are not being reached, because there were already good churches in the area that were well established.

Little did we know, a couple with whom we we had been vaguely acquainted with were feeling the call of God for the same idea during the same time.  We quickly found one another, and it was clear that we were not to start what would look like an identical ministry across town from them. We had similar experiences, visions, and doctrine. We were all so very open to obey the Holy Spirit. So we joined together with Richard and Mindy Watson to help them as they started “The Refuge” as co-laborers in the harvest of souls.

In a short amount of time, The Refuge has become a ministry to students and has become the talk of the town. The mold was broken of how ministry is traditionally done, and how a ministry grows.  Lives are being changed one at a time, and attendance has exceeded our wildest expectations.

As a result of God prospering The Refuge in the way that He has, we have seen a new need for outreach – the families! Because Richard and Mindy are so well entrenched with these students, they can’t focus on the parents outside of the relationships they have built through the students.  And to invite the parents to the student gatherings could discourage some of the students from coming, as it has become “their” time.

So we are excited and honored that we were asked to take on the task of serving in the part of the ministry that would touch the spiritual needs of these families. We will hold weekly Spirit-led family worship times, lead Bible study/Discipleship groups, and provide marriage mentoring. But most importantly, we will do what The Refuge has been founded to do – give them Jesus.

Reaching Real People, who have Real Problems with the Real Solution.

We ask for all of our friends and family to pray for us as we start working.

  • Pray for our family, that the Holy Spirit protect us and keep us renewed before Him.
  • Pray that we remain humble, and that we will always be listening to the heartbeat of God in everything we do.
  • Pray for the people we are reaching out to. Pray their hearts are open to the Gospel and to the healing power of the blood of Jesus.
  • Pray for the ministry of The Refuge, as well as Richard and Mindy. Pray that we will all stay faithful to the vision God has placed before us.

Thank you all for your support and prayers. We are looking forward to what God is going to do as we put our hand to the plow!

Meanwhile, check us out – www.therefugeky.com and find us on Facebook at www.facebook.com/therefugeky

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The Scotts, In the Beginning (part2)…

It became pretty apparent after a short time of us declaring our love for one another that we couldn’t keep it a secret.  In fact we ended up going public when Barbara Young, the secretary at Oak Grove caught us walking hand in hand gazing lovingly into each others eyes at a mall 1 hour from our town.  Barbara straightened me out.  She said “you’ve got nothing to be ashamed of! Quit hiding!”

So we did.  July 1998, we had to decide what we were going to do together.  It had become clear that my time at Oak Grove had come to a close as we knew it.  I didn’t want to prolong the “weirdness” of that feeling, nor did I want to leave Melissa behind.  I knew I wanted to spend the rest of my life with her and we agreed it was time to make something happen, and soon.   So we began on Sunday night, July 26, 1998 to plan the hows, when and who to invite to a wedding.  My parents lived in New Jersey, one set of grandparents in Texas, the other set on the other corner of Arkansas not to mention aunts and uncles everywhere.  We parted that night frustrated that we could not get anyone there anytime soon for a wedding.

Then next morning she had planned on riding along with me to take a member of the youth group to camp in beautiful Hot Springs, AR, then the rest of that day we were going to kick around.  On the way into Hot Springs, there was a place with a big sign and a drive-through window.  The sign said “The Chapel of Love – Drive Through Weddings.”  We all laughed at the thought of a drive through wedding and the kid with us joked and said “you two should stop in there!”  We laughed harder and kept on driving.

After spending some time together in the lovely romantic Hot Springs, we were on our way home.  Drove by “The Chapel of Love” on the way out and laughed again.

Then I squirmed.

Then said “let’s just check it out.”

Then said, “no, everyone would KILL us!”

Then I continued to argue with myself for an hour (I don’t remember Melissa saying anything but “well”, “yeah”, “why not”, “they would”, “that’s fine”).

WARNING: Here is where I BEG GOD not to let me reap with my children what we sowed! I am in no way shape or form recommending ANY of our young couples to do this!  It worked for us, but may not work for you!

Then we turned around.  Yep, one hour down the road we turned around.

We were “fleece” people (read the story in the Bible about Gideon laying out “fleeces”) at the time.  I asked her to marry me, and then we reasoned that if they were still open, we would “check it out.”  Then we got in there and the lady who ran the place told us what they do and that we would need a marriage license if we did it.

So we laid out the “fleece” that if the courthouse was still open (and if we could even find it) that we would go see what it took to get a license.  We didn’t even think you could get a marriage license same day.  Walked in, and they locked the door behind us because they were closing!  They gave us a license on the spot.

Drove back to “The Chapel of Love” with our marriage license and talked to the female minister there for a few more minutes.  10 minutes later, dressed in t-shirts and jean shorts, exchanged tin Cracker-Jack wedding rings and with the landscaper as our witness, were joined in Holy matrimony at 6:00pm, July 27, 1998 at The Chapel Of Love and in the Presence of the Lord.

To be continued Part 3, Telling the Family, Getting married, again…

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